Ah, moving. Brings out the sentimentalist in a gal—and the realization that I have some serious hoarder tendencies. (I told a co-worker just last week that moving wouldn’t be too difficult because “I’m a minimalist.” Kids, take that as a lesson that when you try to be all breezy and superior, you usually end up just being wrong and dumb.)
One of the pack-rat items that I should get rid of are old journals. Man, oh man, to be reminded of thoughts from when I was 16 is cool and terrifying all at the same time. After a little internal debate, I decided that I just can’t get rid of those memories. So fasten your seatbelts, journals, you’re moving to Dallas too.
Each of the three years I’ve lived in Nashville have been so different and growing. And thanks to these new-found journals (it really is a wonder the things to be found under one’s bed), I’ve been able to relive some of the highs and lows during my time in this city. So, I decided to share one journal entry from each year. Some may be funny. Some may be sad. Some may be prayers. But I think it’s a beautiful thing to remember and take joy in the journey. Enjoy…
YEAR 1: FIRST YEAR OUT OF COLLEGE: MOVED TO NASHVILLE WITH NO JOB/HOME/FRIENDS: AGE 22-23: 2012-2013
July 6th 2013
Here’s what you’ve missed (so freakin’ much):
1) That “no-makeup in June” thing lasted a weekend. Not exaggerating. I’m sure my complete failure says a million bad things about my character/self-esteem, but frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.
2) Ericka’s wedding in Nebraska was the highlight of my summer. It was so fun and so great to be back with people who really know me. Missed my pals. Missed those wide-open spaces. It felt like home.
3) On Monday I started having really intense menstrual cramps and passed out at work. Sweet Miriam, whose office I passed out in, called 911, and some friendly EMT dudes wheeled me out on a stretcher to Baptist Hospital. If you were to categorize this story, it would be in the folder labeled “Worst Young Adult Ever.”
4) It’s been a bad week. And a hard year.
5) I thought I was moving in with roommates this year, but it’s not so certain now. I’m ready to have community and accountability, but God is in control.
6) I haven’t been treating God like God lately. He’s been a back-burner thought. I’ve been so stupid. I need the Lord so, so badly. I don’t want to even imagine a life without Him, yet I’ve been ignoring Him for a while. I’m prideful. I’m selfish. I’m oh, so human. I’m sorry, Father. I need You for everything.
Well, there you have it. Year one. It was a doozy and a character-builder. If I’m being honest, it wasn’t filled with super fun stories or exciting new experiences. If anything, I remember being really scared that first year—like all the time. And super broke. And deeply lonely. But there were also amazing blessings, like my first apartment. Oh, how I loved that place. Best case scenario for a Craigslist find. Another positive was realizing I was tougher than I thought (a valuable lesson that is absolutely terrible to learn). So cheers to you, Year One. Here are some pictures, because nostalgia is nothing without pictures. (And in case you’re wondering, yes, I really did pass out at my job due to menstrual cramps.) That last picture has a story. Went for a lunchtime walk; started pouring outside; turns out yellow cotton is see-through when wet. Although my dress didn’t photograph sheer, IT WAS. So, I sucked up my pride (and sucked in my stomach, because sheer dress!!!) and ran as fast as I could to my 4th floor office, only encountering a few unfortunate souls along the way.
Currently listening to “New Slang” by The Shins